Six Flags New England

Whilst on vacation, something is wrong if I have to set my alarm for a time earlier than is required for a normal workday. But I did it. I arose at 6:00am on Wednesday, August 16th, 2006, to go to Six Flags New England.

My die hard, thrill seeking friends from the Chorus, Tim (aka "Timmay"), Santos and Nick arrived precisely at 7:30am. Nick was accompanied by a girlfriend of his named Chris. We piled into Timmay's Nissan and made our way southwest.

Six Flags New England is in Agawam, Massachusetts and is about three hours southwest of Manchester. It was mostly smooth sailing for the entire journey. We made one stop along the way at the Charlton service center on the Mass Pike.

Did you know that if you are a bus driver, you can move to the front of the line at McDonald's? Nick was cut off in line at McDonald's by a bus driver. The driver flashed his badge at the cashier as Nick approached the counter to place his order. It all happened so fast, Nick didn't know what to say, so the louse got away with it. It was a standing joke the rest of the day. We tried to move to the front of the ride lines using the same tactic, but it did not yield the same results.


We arrived at the park as the gates opened at 10:30am. We made the hike from the "standard parking area" to the main entrance. We spent the first few hours tackling some of the bigger rides like Scream, Superman Ride Of Steel, and The Mind Eraser. The park was a bit crowded so there was quite a wait on some of the rides. Plus, someone had an unfortunate stomach wrenching incident on Mind Eraser, so we had to wait while they initiated the "Vomit Eraser" cleaning sequence before we could proceed.


SPF 30 time! We made our way to Hurricane Harbor. It was a perfect day for water rides. We pretty much hit them all. The lines were a bitch in there, as well. But there was plenty to keep my eyes busy whilst we waited. I think my favorite ride in the water park would have to be Typhoon. It was a water based roller coaster and was a completely different experience. You get in a three person raft and make your way through a water slide with up and down hills similar to a roller coaster. You are propelled on the uphill portions by conveyor belts. You are enveloped in water at the top of each hill by pipes on the left and right of the chute. I was unprepared for the first deluge and I think I swallowed a half gallon of water as I was laughing.

We finished the afternoon in the water park, changed, and headed back into the main park around 6:00pm. Timmay picked us up some coupon books. In there were coupons for two-for-one turkey legs. Mmm. Meat! Grunt! We made our way to Crack-Axle Canyon. As we placed our order, the young whipper snappers behind the counter made us a deal. We ended up getting two "messed up" turkey legs for $3.25. Believe me, this is a STEAL! Everything in the park is exorbitantly overpriced. We thought there had to be a catch. What exactly did "messed up" mean? Turns out they just weren't pretty. Timmay's leg was broken. My leg was deformed a bit (poor little turkey). But it's meat! Who cares if it's pretty? If it's edible, I'll eat it. So we got two turkey legs for less than the price of a bottle of Six Flags water! Bam Bam!

Now that our stomachs were full, what better to do than hop on a few more thrill rides. We attempted to get on some of the rides in the Main Street Plaza. But, as we got in each line, each ride seemed to break at that moment. Some of us did get on Catapult. This thing was nuts! It was like a double-ended (get your mind out of the gutter, kids) fly swatter with 24 seats in a square pattern at each end. They load up the ride, strap you in tighter than I would imagine being harnessed for a shuttle launch, and bring you up 105 feet. Then they kick the ride into motion and you are spinning around on this fly swatter at about 30 miles per hour. I have never felt the blood rush to my head so fast. It was the most awkwardly enjoyable ride of the day.

We wrapped up the night with a few more rides including Batman The Dark Knight and Flashback. As the park closing approached, Nick and I hurried our way back to Catapult. We managed to get on the last ride, just as the closing announcement echoed throughout the park. We were in the last row. As they were securing us for blastoff, the attendant moved all the other occupants of the last row to other seats on the ride to "balance it." We thought we were dead for sure. And off we go. This second ride seemed even more intense than the first. Nick started making me laugh, and I though for sure that I was going to have an aneurysm. But we finished the ride with only a few girlish screams.

The drive out of the parking lot was a thrill ride in itself. It was every man for himself. After some time and some eye-closing, sissy-bar grabbing moments, we managed to hit the main drag and make our way to the highway.

Santos, Chris and I passed out in the back seat while Timmay and Nick chattered away. We arrived back in Manchester around midnight.

I love my Chorus boys! It is days like these that make singing with the New Hampshire Gay Men's Chorus a formality.